Saturday, October 6, 2007

Sack-Up Saturday


"Hey Matty, guess what? The Trojans lost to Stanford, you got benched and WE'RE PREGNANT!"

Stanford Is Good

No wonder these 40 point Dogs beat the Preseason National Champion USC Trojans. Look at these scintillating Stanford stats (out of 119)...

Total Offense : 62
Scoring Offense : 87
Rushing Defense : 94
Pass Efficiency Defense: 116
Total Defense: 102
Scoring Defense: 102
Punt Returns : 92
Turnover Margin: 84
Pass Defense : 94
Passing Efficiency: 77
Sacks Allowed: 112

Wow, USC went and lost to a program that claims a damn tree mascot, and Stanford seems to care for football just slightly more than I care for blunt testicular trauma. It's not even a cool tree like a Sycamore or a Sequoia, it's just "tree." What a bunch of french fried homos. Way to ruin a USC vs. LSU national championship beatdown. (Amazing Box! 4 Picks for John Parker Wilson David Booty)

Speaking of LSU, Nice effin' game! One of the best I've seen. Everyone here needs to personally thank this 12th-year-senior LSU guy for suiting up and saving the SEC's hopes at a national title and making Tim Tebow cry his own tears of non-joy...


Jacob Hester - a middle aged man among boys

Craziness...Did you know that South Florida didn't even field a team back when Vanilla Ice was rollin' down A1A..."BEACHFRONT AVENUE," now they're gonna be top 5. College football is so fubariffic.


"Toss my Top 5 Salad, Saban!"

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